where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
If I don't get struck by a lightning bolt from God by midnight it will be a Christmas miracle.
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
She couldn't find her toothbrush so I had to wait while she sucked on the 12 peppermints she found under the couch. Pretty resourceful for her level of intoxication.
Randomize
