yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
I just bought the big bottle of Patron. It looks small. What have I done with my life?
Succeeded.
I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
Just did a line with a monopoly bill. Tell me I'm not fancy.
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
One day I'll learn not to get drunk on a plane. Today is not that day.
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
Randomize
