omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
While in Europe, he bought me a pouring tap to put on my liquor so I don't spill. This means 2 things.1) He really loves me. 2) I'm a noticeable alcoholic.
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
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