but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
I have a callous on the palm of my hand just below my ring finger that is entirely from opening so many beer bottles. I'm strangely proud right now.
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
I just soaked a sugar cookie in nail polish remover to clean off my nails because I was too lazy to walk to the bathroom to get a cotton ball. Is this what rock bottom feels like?
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
He took me out, we slept together, and he sent me home this morning with fresh cantaloupe. #husbandstatus
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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