idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
she says she's going to shake me awake in 15min intervals if I pass out
this was your mom?
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
Randomize
