the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
I've never wanted to punch a 94 year old woman in the vagina, and then call her next of kin to tell them I just muff punched their Gam Gam until today.
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
Randomize
