we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
I just brought the toaster out onto the porch to light a cigarette, don't talk to me about being desperate.
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
I just need a text that says "put that food down bitch" and then maybe I'll lose water weight through tears
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
the dj asked me quote "are you sure you're sober enough to do this?" And I grabbed the mic from him and said "ill fucking show you sober- HIT IT". I also dropped the mic at the end so he had to come around and pick it up
Shania Twain would have been proud
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
Randomize
