A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
You had me at "mimosas" several texts ago.
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
You've changed since you got that strap on
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
Randomize
