I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
I just found 51 cents in my bed. Did you leave me a tip?
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
Just found out they make medicinal lollipops, bought like 40 of them. Gonna go fill a pediatricians lollipop bowl.
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
Wait. Did you let me snort wine last night cause I wanted to smell jesus's blood?
Yes. I have pictures. Your soul is mine.
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
Randomize