Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
If someone cant be won over with guacomole and tequila they are not worth your time.
We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old.
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
what kind of dress can i wear to my high school reunion that says "even though i'm more successful than all of you i'm still up for sex"?
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
I spent half an hour sculpting my pubes into a perfect triangle of really short hair, and the first thing he said when he saw it was "Don't you think you need a shave?"
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
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