Did you call me this morning? I was really drugged up and don't remember.
Have a good day. My vagina shrank.
I was going to clean my house but wine sounded better
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
i'm too stoned to be pregnant. the kicking is morse code for wanting beef jerky.
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
You will go out on a boat of flames filled with honor, sarcasm, and assholery, let me assure you.
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
Ok: all ex-gfs except you from the last 5 years have or are about to have a baby...be on the lookout...
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
Randomize
