Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
So, remember how that one doctor said it was 1 in a million that I'd get pregnant...
Yeeah thank god
Well..welcome to parenting Mr. one in a million.
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
Remember that picture you sent me of you trying to eat the flower arrangement in the bathroom at that restaurant?
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
Thanks for takin my cousin out last night, sorry I passed out so early
You kidding, the kids a legend. He literally killed a bottle of Jamison, made out with a girl AND her Mom at the bar, stole us slices of pizza and told the cab driver where to go in Spanish. He doesn't even live in the area. Can we keep him?
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
Was reaching for my vibrator this morning out of my nightstand and strained my neck muscle. I'm getting so old.
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize
