I'm trashed wearing your mom's snuggie. She says hello.
Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
Gong!
YOU'RE MARRIED NOW YOU CAN'T KEEP GONGING ME WHEN YOU GET LAID IT DOESN'T COUNT
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
That last minute feeling of hesitation on whether I should bring my health card to the bar usually means I'm in for a good night.
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
Randomize
