So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
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