I don't think my ego could take a straight man out-cooking me.
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
I woke up with the new contact "Britney Both Nipples Pierced"... how do you think the night went?
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
Randomize
