I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
This is the minute she broke up with me. If you're receiving this mass text, you are one for the girls who made me promise to text you at this point.
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
How did the date go? No fake eyeballs this time?
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
Randomize
