I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
So hung over, I told one of the candidates she's hired if we can turn the lights off and take a nap instead of doing her interview. I feel like she has potential.
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
Peanut butter and whiskey is not a dinner
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
Randomize
