i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
A girl just asked me to co-sign for her boob job because she didn't have enough credit built up. This is a first.
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
I was masturbating in my bed this morning when my ipod alarm went off and it started playing "show me the meaning of being lonely"
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
Randomize
