I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
We fucked, she finished, high fived me, the pulled a celebratory pack of gushers out of her purse for each of us. I'm going to marry your sister dude.
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
Randomize
