so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
I used a jello pudding cup as a shot chaser last night. I'm the Bill Cosby of alcoholics
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
Just saw the mall santa roll by on a rascal scooter holding a chic-fil-a milkshake and stop to chat up trio of cute 20-somethings. New hero.
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
So what we learned was that it doesn't matter how skinny the stripper is, if she sits on your knee with a torn acl for two hours it's going to swell up
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