Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
I just fixed my mom's tv over the phone in 2.17 minutes while high. I'm a fucking professional.
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
I figure blowing aggressively into a harmonica is better than screaming, "GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME YOU SOCIOPATHIC SUCCUBUS" to my sister, in the middle of an auditorium, during my mothers college graduation ceremony.
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
Randomize
