Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
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