We all know the best way to start a relationship is greeting while at least one of you are intoxicated, dual facebook stalking, and a two week long game of 20 questions via texts to 'really' get to know each other. In that order.
I wouldn't have it any other way. It's like a fairy tale!
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
Came so hard my ears popped. This lovely piece of news and pissin in my driveway brought to you by rum
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
Ughh I think I'll just sit here in the dark and wallow in self-pity while drinking wine and knitting scarves for my future cats.
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
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