Do you still have your period?
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
You've got to be fucking kidding me. Do you think "Husband drunkenly pees all over floors" is reasonable grounds for divorce? So pissed off right now.
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
Randomize
