they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
Randomize
