I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
Ok, as his sister I didn't tell you this but he's very familiar with pregnancy symptoms. So next time he calls you fat freak him the hell out by asking if your ankles look swollen.
Randomize
