Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
theres bread in your mailbox im going to eat it
nevermind its newpaper
Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
don't worry dude, we didn't fuck on your bed out of respect for you
couldn't find a condom?
basically
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
When are your genitals available?
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
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