if i dont get laid while im dressed as Tim Tebow, i'm just staying true to the costume.
She volunteers at a homeless shelter. You volunteered to drink 7 day expired milk for $3. No chance. Give up.
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
Everyone is sleeping and i'm sittin here in my iron man mask, watchin chelsea lately and tryin to figure out how to smoke through it.
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
Randomize