that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
I just lost $50 at the races, got drunk, and woke up to my ex-gf. Apparently the good decisions kept on rolling...
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
Today is all about not throwing up, where the fuck are my keys and does anyone know what happened to that guy in the panda suit my roommate had sex with last night.
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
I'm sitting at my kitchen table alone dressed as a dinosaur smoking bowls in the dark. Is this rock bottom? Or is this living the dream? Who's to say
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
Don't care if they even pay me; I lifeguard for the fringe benefits -- free tourist vagina in the Hilton jacuzzi every single night
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
Randomize
