just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
He left me a five minute voicemail apologizing for chasing me with a meat beater. I'm actually not sure what that means.
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
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