hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
nothing says "fuck you jocks from high school my life is better than yours" like bringing 5 grand in 20s to the bar
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
My sister just showed me a snap chat that I don't remember sending, it was a picture of me with two big macs in my bra with just the words "BURGER TITS"
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
Jack said he hasn't jerked off in like two weeks and he's like a smoldering volcano who wants to bury you like Pompeii with his man gravy
Randomize
