so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
Update on my sex life: my calves are sore from masturbating too much. It's a thing. Look it up.
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
Randomize
