There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
To the person who left a cup of vomit in the bathroom: I commend you for your aim but you are dead to me- not an ideal birthday present.
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
I'll have a whole suitcase of emergency bacon with me obviously
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
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