Drunk x Brooklyn = problems getting home. If I don't make it you can have my computer and my bitches. You're welcome.
I hate all girls vehemently.
i'm so high that my cigarette just tasted like chef boyardee. no lie.
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
Randomize
