is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Randomize
