my mother just offered to pay for my fake id.
I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
There was no eligible dick at the ER. I'm pissed. Looks like "Searching for Strange at the Local Free Clinic" is a no go for the name of our first full length album. On the other hand, I got a dilaudid shot and I no longer feel like I have the worst bladder infection of my life.
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
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