I thought you should know that you passed out in your trash can last night.
Thanks for throwing up on me.
I'm waiting for seagulls to eat this throw up
i just heard the ice cream truck outside while mid-masturbation. i stopped and considered running outside to buy one.
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
false alarm. still invincible.
I forgot how hot balto sounded
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
Randomize
