what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
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