He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
i'm too stoned to be pregnant. the kicking is morse code for wanting beef jerky.
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
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