google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
The only way that night could have gotten any better would be if a unicorn would descend from the heavens with a nacho bell grande in a bag around its horn beat boxing Hakunah Matata.
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
Randomize
