I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
I just woke up with a cowboy hat on my face and a playboy from the 90s on my chest
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