my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
Church boner. Awkwardddd
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
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