he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
She always acts like she's doing me a favor with a hand job. I've been giving myself hand jobs for almost 20 years.
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
This is John, I met you downtown last night.
Oh, ok.
This is the cop that kept you out of trouble last night
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
I dropped my slice of pineapple on the kitchen floor and was just staring at it about to cry. It was really good pineapple.
Randomize
