There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
Let's get this straight. I am six fucking feet tall. Do you even understand how limited my options in guys to date are? No. Did you see my last three boyfriends? I looked like a fucking giant next to them. So I will fuck this six-foot-seven Italian model even if I am the ugliest girl at this party because, goddammit, I deserve to.
Randomize
