Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN
HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN
Thanks for loaning me your shower and panties. My hubby is awesome, but I shouldn’t go home commando, smelling like lube and sperm again
I did not marry a roomba.
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