he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
A stranger just came up to me and asked why I hadn't texted him, and if he was just a one night stand. I live for these moments.
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
I'm a little concerned about right now. You showed up at my house soaking wet, drunk with a bag of ham and 2 liter of Dr. Pepper, and you refused to tell me where you got the ham until I gave you some more liquor.
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
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