well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
My brain says no but my pants say off.
I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me"
You tried to tip the paramedic for finding you.
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
There are leaves in my underwear?
Randomize