Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
he broke off your car antennae to use as a walking stick before he smoked because he claimed to lack the facial strength needed to open his eyes when he's high
It'll be a Christmas-Fucking-Miracle if we get through the ceremony without a groomsman vomming
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
Do you remember whose house we're in?
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
Randomize
