I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
I might have snap chatted him. So here's what I need you to do. Find him. Abduct him. Get his phone. View the chat so he can't. Then, buy him ice cream. He deserves ice cream.
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
You can't just say you're dying of terminal cancer everytime they try to card you
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
I’m literally watching say yes to the dress, eating fancy cheeses with crackers, and I have orange dark chocolates. All of which is being washed down with merlot. And I’m 100% sure a porno is gonna go down next door tonight. They don’t have a car and arrived via taxi. Happy holidays from motel 6 Pendleton Oregon!
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