Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
Randomize
